As the years have ticked by these moments have lessened.
I asked myself if there was a moment that I loved my body. There was one moment that I thought of instantly
The day that I gave birth to my daughter..
The loathing I have felt for my body was replaced by awe and pride after I had my daughter.
As soon as I went into labour my body took over. I had a very smooth labour, with my daughter being born within 5 hours and I only ended up using gas. No, I don't mean to gloat (my friend often mutters 'bitch', in a very loving way, when I talk about my smooth labour) I am just in awe of this. I thought I would not cope with the pain, I feared that I would be in labour for a long time, and agonised over the thought that something could go wrong.
I started to appreciate my woman's body for the amazing thing it just accomplished. My body, the same one that I have felt had let me down, had carried my healthy daughter for 9 months. It helped grow her, accommodate her and nurture her during that time. It went on to birth her.
When I look at my body I still see the stretch marks. I still see the large thighs, the love handles, the fat on my back. I still at times dislike what I see. However I appreciate and love my body for what it helped give me. I am a little kinder to myself.
A few months after I gave birth I briefly lamented to my Husband that I had more stretchmarks than ever before my tummy was still soft and squishy and I was larger than ever. He looked at me and told me that he loved it just as it was. Most of all because what all those things meant. They meant that I had had a child, his child, and he loved me and my body for that more than anything.
He was right. That is something worthy of loving yourself for.
I look at my daughter everyday and remind myself that she came from me. I know I can proudly say ...
I HEART MY BODY
I love that it carried and delivered my beautiful Daughter
I love that my Husband thinks it's beautiful, and admires it for giving him his Daughter
I love that I am feeling more secure in my own skin as I am getting older