I heart my body!

I have not always had an easy relationship with my body. I have not always felt comfortable in my own skin. There have been times that I have raged at my appearance in the mirror. I have loathed photos of myself and am absent from many.I have mostly felt pretty let down and betrayed by it. It always has seemed to work against me. My weight has always fluctuated, my body seems to punish me when I indulge by instantly slamming on the weight. It has then been slow in taking that weight, which went on so quickly, off again.

As the years have ticked by these moments have lessened.

I asked myself if there was a moment that I loved my body. There was one moment that I thought of instantly

The day that I gave birth to my daughter..

The loathing I have felt for my body was replaced by awe and pride after I had my daughter.

As soon as I went into labour my body took over. I had a very smooth labour, with my daughter being born within 5 hours and I only ended up using gas. No, I don't mean to gloat (my friend often mutters 'bitch', in a very loving way, when I talk about my smooth labour) I am just in awe of this. I thought I would not cope with the pain, I feared that I would be in labour for a long time, and agonised over the thought that something could go wrong.

 I started to appreciate my woman's body for the amazing thing it just accomplished. My body, the same one that I have felt had let me down, had carried my healthy daughter for 9 months. It helped grow her, accommodate her and nurture her during that time. It went on to birth her.
.

When I look at my body I still see the stretch marks. I still see the large thighs, the love handles, the fat on my back. I still at times dislike what I see. However I appreciate and love my body for what it helped give me. I am a little kinder to myself.

A few months after I gave birth I briefly lamented to my Husband that I had more stretchmarks than ever before my tummy was still soft and squishy and I was larger than ever. He looked at me and told me that he loved it just as it was. Most of all because what all those things meant. They meant that I had had a child, his child, and he loved me and my body for that more than anything.

He was right. That is something worthy of loving yourself for.

I look at my daughter everyday and remind myself that she came from me. I know I can proudly say ...

I HEART MY BODY

I love that it carried and delivered my beautiful Daughter
I love that my Husband thinks it's beautiful, and admires it for giving him his Daughter
I love that I am feeling more secure in my own skin as I am getting older

Aussie Curves - Break the rules 2!

Earlier in the week I shared my Aussie Curves Breaking the rules. Nerida is now ready to share hers!

Shrug - City Chic

Tunic - City Chic

Shoes - Spendless Shoes

Like me, Nerida tends to follow 'fashion rules' that are more about her own confidence. One thing that I always tell her is that she has killer legs. With my shape being a pear my legs tend to be thinker and more chunky. However Nerida's legs are thinner and much more shapely. I am always telling her to show them off a bit more, I know I would if they were mine.

So this week Nerida accepted my challenge and put on this outfit.

Really, if you had legs like those wouldn't you wear something short more often?

Aussie Curves - Break the rules!

When I thought of this week's theme I was at first thinking of playing it safe. I was going to break fashion rules such as mixing dots and stripes, or florals  with florals etc. However I started to realise that I have many fashion rules of my own. Restrictions that I place on myself because I am a 'fat girl'.

Generally I follow 'rules' for my shape. After all  that is why my Sister and I chose to refer to ourselves as sister Apple and Sister Pear. There are 'rules' you can follow to flatter your shape. Play up the positives and disguise the negatives. I know within the plus size fashion world there is a movement to 'throw away' these rules. Wear what makes your heart sing. I love this idea. I think it is great to see plus size women who are embracing themselves and having some self love and confidence. However, I am still happy to also wear what makes me feel good, and much of what makes me feel good does tend to follow the fashion do's and don'ts for my pear shape.

This is the 12th week of Aussie Curves. It has been wonderful to be part of a community of plus sized women who are celebrating their curves and sharing their own fashion. So, this week I decided to be bold and break some of these rules I follow. I even challenged myself to go out while wearing my outfit.

Two rules I am quite stringent about are :

• Never wear a hemline above my knees 
• Never year a sleeveless top unless wearing a cardigan

Top: Cable & Gauge

Skirt: Autograph (last season)

Belt: ASOS Curve

Shoes: Rivers

Earrings & Bangles : Mix of Diva & Equip

I dug out a denim skirt that I do wear. I honestly don't remember it being as short when I bought it, however it seems to be shorter than what i usually wear. I wore it a lot through Winter with leggings. I often pull the 

skirt down so it sits just on my knees and keep it there with a belt tied firmly in place. This time I let it sit around my waist and let that hemline sit above my knees.

Finding a top was a greater challenge. I didn't want to wear a top with spaghetti straps, yet i really don;t seem to own tops that don;t at least have a capped sleeve or are spaghetti straps. I then saw my lovely floral top. When I put it on it felt right. It was still very flattering with all the gathering at the bust, the asymmetrical hem and the soft gathering. I actually decided the it had a bit of a peplum feel to it. I popped on a new pair of wedge heels ( I so love them, so watch out for a post this week just about my recent shoe obsession!!)

I actually felt really lovely in this outfit. My Husband agreed that I looked great, although he did warm me not to do too much bending over in the skirt! Ha! He is not used to me wearing anything above my knees either!

When I cast a critical eye over my photos I would say that I really don;t know why I cover my arms so much. Yes, they are wide, but they are also smooth and blemish free. You can't really see the silvery stretch marks on the underside. I suspect I may be more daring this summer and not always wear a cardigan over my tops! 

What are your fashion rules? Why don;t you try breaking them sometimes? You may be surprised and quite like it!

While your at it, check out these other rule breakers!

Movie Date.. with a gal pal.

I recently went out for dinner and a movie with a Mum from my Mummy group. It was a rare treat for both of us. Your life definitely becomes consumed by your little one when you become a Mum. Although both my Husband and I have made  a point of ensuring we get some time with each other, but also by ourselves. It is so important to not lose yourself when you have a child. I think many times, women especially, lose their identity a bit. They become 'Mum' , sometimes 'Wife', but forget themselves.  

My friend and I decided to go see a movie, in Gold Class, share a cheese platter and go out for cake and coffee after. We watched the Australian comedy 'Mental' Oh My Word - HILARIOUS! I would recommend it to anyone, especially if you have an affection for quirky Aussie humor  We both cackled and roared our way through the movie. 

Afterwards we gossiped while we enjoyed a coffee and a piece of red velvet cake. Sharing our trials and triumphs as Mothers, Wives and in other aspects of our life. It is a friendship that I certainly cherish. 

Dress - Big W

Jacket - Crossroads

Shoes - Kmart

Necklace - Lovisa

Belt - Came with another dress

I wanted to wear something a bit special, but still a little casual. My skater dress from Biw W was perfect for this. I really love this dress as it is a thick knit but still light enough to wear into the warmer months, with 3/4 sleeves so my arms are covered. The best part about it is hat it can be worn to work, dressed up for going out, and dressed down for the movies.

The denim jacket really helps make the dress more casual. I also really love wearing brown with black. It always seems to lighten it up a bit. I popped on a brown belt, and a pair of brown canvas wedges

The wedges are also a total steal at Kmart for $15. The are really comfortable and fit my wider foot. I bought them in black too, and plan on going back for a red pair first chance I get.

I felt comfortable but still a bit special in the outfit. I must also add, it felt like a real treat to be able to go out with just a small handbag containing a phone, wallet and lippie! Ah, such luxury!

Tell me, do you make sure you take time out for yourself and catch up with a friend? What is your favourite place to go with a gal pal?

Aussie Curves - Knit

This week all the Aussie Curves ladies will be wearing knits. I know for me when it comes to cardigans I own a heap. I have mentioned before that I am self conscious about my arms. I generally always have them covered up, even during summer.

I actually have so many knits that I keep them in two separate areas. In my bedroom, I keep all long sleeve cardigans in a drawer. Only this weekend I decided to pull out my really thick winter jumpers and put them in another storage box, as I had so many long sleeved ones that the (very large) drawer was having trouble closing!

In my coat cupboard I use a shoe holder to hold all my short sleeve, cropped cardigans. There are 8 holes in the holder, and I have about 3 cardigans per hole. It's a sickness I tell you.

You would think then that I felt I had this week's theme 'covered', however my problem was that I felt a little uninspired. To me my knits are such a staple item that it was like being asked to feature a plain singlet top.

However, I suppose that is the point with Aussie Curves, share what works for you!

Cardigan - Temt

Dress - Old Navy 

Shoes - Spendless Shoes

Bracelet - Diva

Brooch - Ebay

Earrings - a gift from Italy

When I wear a cardigan with a dress or skirt I like it to stop just above my hips or below my bust. For my pear shape I find this is best, as it draws the eye to my narrowest part. If a cardigan is too long , and a dress is too flowy, it can make me look shapeless, which just makes me look larger. This cardigan has a lovely knitted pattern. It also has little pearl buttons and just a narrow hint of lace near the buttons. I like to add a brooch to my cardigans sometimes instead of wearing a necklace. 

Pear Tip: Have cardigans sit below the bust or above the hip. This si the narrowest part of your body. If you wear a longer cardigan, draw the eyes to your waist with a belt. It can even be tied over the top of your cardigan for a different look

The dress is a soft stretch material.  The gathering in the bust adds a bit of interest to the dress, while also making the bust area look a bit bigger. It then has an a line skirt, but is not to flowy either. I just love it, it is perfect for me.

I thought the whole look had a 'garden tea party' feel to it, so I dug out an adorable old bracelet I have. It has little ceramic teapots, cups and tea spoons on it. I also have the matching necklace. It is such a kitch litte charm bracelet, and perfect for the knit.

Nerida is sitting for some exams at Tafe this week, so she isn't doing any photos. Although, she did do my makeup. Over the weekend she needed to add another 'look' to her make up portfolio, so I went over and acted as 'model' so she could create a bridal look. Perfect! I LOVED it. I didn't so much love wearing a mocked up 'bridal' dress (a white dress found with a sheer white bolero) and having photos taken out in the street. She needed a nice background so I had to walk down her street to stand in front of a flowering tree and have some photos taken. Her neighbours were peering out of their windows trying to work out what on earth was going on. On the bright side, I look super lovely in my photos this week.

Make sure you go see what the other ladies are wearing this week. Maybe you have a blog and want to join in? Read the instruction below. The more the merrier!

A Revelation

Starting this blog has been a revelation for both of us. Being 'big girls' we have often had times when we felt unattractive. I know that all women feel this, but I think when you are plus size it is heightened. Trying on new clothing hasn't always been a positive experience. It has always been crushing when you try on clothing after clothing to find nothing that fits. Going into shops to discover they have nothing available in your size. Walking past more than half the shops in a shopping centre because there is no point in entering it.Clothing that is badly cut, with no consideration of a plus sized figure. Even when it is marked as 'your size'.

 I always have a real problem with arms. Seriously, it seems that sometimes they forget to up size the arms from a size 10 to 18. Many times I have attempted to try on a top that looks like it would fit perfectly. Except I couldn't get my arms through the holes. Or worse, I DO squeeze my arms through the holes, but they are so tight the circulation gets cut off. I then have an 'episode' in the change-room as I attempt to get my arms back out. Head covered by the top, I start to tug it off. Only to find my arms are firmly wedged in the holes. More tugging occurs, with the top still around my head. I start to get claustrophobic and hyperventilate. I have to pull the top back over my head to take in some fresh air before I re-start operation 'get the bloody thing off' again. Thankfully the top eventually comes off. The worst part though is I am left feeling humiliated and filled with self loathing. I especially feel angry that the retailer didn't consider the fact that a woman that is a size 16+ may be so all over, including the friggen arms.

Recently much of this is starting to change. Many retailers are seeing the market for plus size women in Australia. Finally my sister and I, and many other plus sized women, are able to find well cut beautiful clothing THAT FITS. It's still not perfect, there is still a long way to go. However it is a start. Starting this blog has linked us up to many other plus sized blogs. Through them we are becoming exposed to other brands, styles and outfits that we otherwise wouldn't have known. We are becoming inspired by the other beautiful curvy ladies, seeing that plus size does not have to mean unfashionable. In fact, in some cases it can mean fashion forward. Most of all, we have started to feel good about ourselves. We often say to each other 'Did you read that comment about how nice we looked?' and 'That person said she liked my outfit'. We are starting to see ourselves in a new light. We are starting to feel attractive. We are taking care in our appearance. Most of all we are liking what we see. We still may want to be thinner. We still may hunger to be a few sizes smaller. However, we are also starting to love ourselves more. Maybe one day we will be thinner, but right now we are learning to love the bodies that we are in.

 It has been a revelation, and we are loving it.

Aussie Curves - Blue (with a hooded eye make up tutorial)

Neither of us wear much of the colour blue. It isn't that we have anything against it, it's just not a colour that we gravitate towards very much. We do have a little bit of is royal blue, mainly due to the current colour blocking trend. For this weeks challenge we are not only showing off our outfits, but are also showing a great blue eyeshadow look that is especially great for the 'hooded eyelid' such as ours.

Janna  says:

 I have one to die for dress in a royal blue. It is from one of my most lust after plus size designer brands, Igigi. I bought this dress for two weddings that I attended a few months after I had my daughter. I wanted something that was colourful, but still flattering. I wanted something that didn't cling too much, but didn't look like a sack either. I tried on many dresses but kept looking at this one dress on styleandsubstance (An Australian stockist of Igigi and Kiyonna, although currently on a hiatus).

It was called 'So Pretty!' and it so was! I was unsure about buying off the Internet without trying on but I took the plunge and went for it.

Dress- Igigi

Shoes - Spendless Shoes

Earrings - Diva

Bracelets - Mix of Diva, Lovisa & Equip

I am so glad I did. The dress is all kinds of lovely. The fabric is a thick, silky stretch. It is lined with a thick stretch material too so it really does smooth you out. The one shoulder gives me a bit of gathering at the bust, which I really need. Being a pear shape I am much smaller on top than on bottom. I need to balance out my shape a bit, so I find ruching or gathering at the bust (plus a very good padded bra) helps balance out my wider hips.

For this look I kept it simple. Glitter heels, sparkly earrings and bangles. I had read that when you do one shoulder it is best to have your hair up rather than down. It allows your shoulders to feature.

I am not a huge fan of my arms, and if I were going out I would most likely have a wrap to just drape over my arms. However in this dress I feel like it is so pretty, no one would be looking at my arms anyway!

Nerida says:

I went for a more casual look. You have seen this cardigan before in other photos. I do wear it a lot because it is a really light weight stretch fabric. It is great to wear in the warmer weather. I really don't like to show my arms very much so I prefer to wear cardigans such as these. Besides, they add a nice pop of colour.

 Cardigan - SES

Dress - Best & Less 'Lily & Lou'

Shoes - Big W

Necklace - Market stall

The dress is a new purchase from Best & Less 'Lily & Lou' range. I just love it. The top part is just flowy enough to skim over my curves but not too loose either. The angled cut actually creates a bit of shape. They have a striped top version, and apparently an orange one but I couldn't find the orange at my local Best & Less.

What I really wanted to share with you was my makeup look. I am currently at Tafe studying Beauty Therapy. I completed a make up course at Tafe at the start of the year. This is a step towards a new career for me, where hopefully I can provide for my Son, while enjoying what I do.

Both Janna and I have what is called 'hooded eyelids'. This is common in Caucasian women, and it is basically where the eyelid is mostly covered when the eyes are open. This can make your eyes look smaller in your face, and also create shadowing under your eyes. This means that not all make up looks work on our eyes. I am starting to learn some really great tips at Tafe that have helped us get the most out of our makeup.

To do my makeup I started with my primer and foundation. However after I apply my foundation I now use a darker concealer or bronzer to contour my face. I put the bronzer under my cheekbone and under my chin along the jaw, and then blend it in well . This actually creates a bit of shadowing, which make you face appear thinner. Set the makeup with a bit of powder.

I then used a white shadow all over my eyelid, right up to my brow. I  added a bit of blue just in the corner of my eyes, and blended it into and just above the crease. The white eyeshadow makes the eyelid appear larger and reduces shadowing. I only apply blue to the corner and crease so it doesn't make my eyes look too dark, and therefore small.

- 

Eyeshadow & Lipstick - Inglot

Mascara - Falsies Maybelline

Finally I add a thin line of eyeliner and mascara. Pop on a bit of pink lippy, some blush on my cheekbones and I am done.

There you go, A simple blue eyeshadow look for the hooded eye!

Are you feeling 'blue'? Check out the other ladies