My beautiful first born. You are the child that made me a Mother. Through you I have already learnt so much. Not just about parenting, but also about myself. I find myself wanting to change some things about myself just so I can be the best role model possible for you.
The moment you were born was really magical. I was blessed with a great birth, where I came out of it feeling empowered and proud to be a woman. it changed me. You changed me. We called all our loved ones and urged them to come into the hospital right away. Your Daddy and I were just so proud. So your family arrived. You were born at 8:02 pm and you were surrounded by family by about 8:30pm.
As a newborn you were very easygoing. You slept well. You were bottlefed, but fell into a routine very quickly. I joke that ou were just lulling Dad and I into a false sense of security. Sure enough, as you became more alert we discovered that we had a very feisty little girl.
You do nothing by halves. You run rather than walk. You demand to be played with. You have a strong will and you are not easily swayed from your path.
Parenting you can be challenging. You delight us, but also can be very frustrating. Yet, I find myself wanting to parent you in a way so that I teach you manners and respect, while still preserving some of that strength and determination. I firmly believe that this world needs strong, forceful women that know what they want. I want you to always be that. I also want you to listen, to behave, to follow instructions.
You have been very excited about becoming a 'Big Sister'. You like to kiss and cuddle my belly, and refuse to go to bed without giving 'Baby Brother/Sister' a kiss. It is not all smooth sailing though. I know you are nervous, anxious about what changes this will bring. I know this through your behaviour. You have been throwing huge tantrums over ridiculous things. You battle with your Dad over anything that will make him give you a reaction. For the first time ever you cry when i drop you off to preschool, insisting you want to stay with me. Your strong will and determination is testing us like it never has before.'
I am cherishing every moment in these last few weeks. Every cuddle we have I enjoy. I breathe you in and tell you how much I love you. We are setting up new routines so that they are familiar, but will make life easier for all of once once the baby arrives. We have been on some special family outings, just so we can soak up these last moments where it will be just the three of us.
By the end of next week you will be a Sister. I know you will be loving and caring. I know you will be as proud to share them with your much loved family as we were to share you.
Just know you are loved deeply. Nothing will ever change that. You will always be my 'baby'. My precious girl that made me a Mother. You gave me the greatest gift on earth.
I love you Abigail